Thursday, October 18, 2012

Anything you can do... I can do better!

Why does everything have to be a "Men versus Women" thing? Women hear that men do this or men have that and then it is WAR. "Well I'm woman so hear me roar! Louder and BETTER than a man!" Equality isn't about being MORE and trampling all over the opposite gender. WOMEN - it is time to be proud to be a WOMAN and stop comparing yourself to MEN! They were created in a unique way, just as YOU were created in a unique way. We weren't created to be the exact same. We don't need a world full of men and she-men. We need WOMEN! Yes, you can be mighty IN YOUR OWN RIGHT. Feminism began as a movement so that women had equal rights but it has evolved into this world of women believing they are somehow better than their counterparts. That's not equality. 

(Lest anyone try to "read between the lines" and think I'm saying something else entirely - I'm not talking about every woman leaving the workforce to go home and bake and iron clothes in frilly aprons - I'm talking about the attitude and spirit behind what feminism has become, this power struggle rather than equality. I love Stay-at-Home-Dads and I think it's great that women work and while there does seem to be some issues IN THE WORKFORCE in regard to pay based on gender some people are taking it to an extreme where it becomes this vein through their entire life, not just their job, affecting everything beyond their paycheck, including how they view men in general).

When women get divorced, such a tragedy especially if adultery or something seriously malevolent was going on, and the woman is encouraged by well-meaning friends and family that she can do it all and be all - to screw men! Who needs 'em anyway?! One bad apple doesn't ruin the entire tree. Why are all men suddenly placed in this bushel and marked off as terrible and no good? What if men did that to women? Well they have and do say that about women. And it hurts us as women. If it hurts us why would it not also hurt them? 

What started my little rant? Just saw a quote that said "The uterus is the most amazing organ. If men had one they'd brag about it - so should we". It became a MEN thing when it didn't need to. If you love your uterus and want to brag about how awesome it is, then go right ahead. But why do men always have to be thrown under the bus in order for us to be proud about something? Or for us to desire something? It's ridiculous.

I don't want to start a whole other war or issues. I just am tired of seeing this "Us versus Them" stuff everywhere I turn. I'm not a feminist but I am feminine. I do believe in equal rights but I also believe that our gender does play a role in our uniqueness at our core, though sometimes a couple finds that they are stronger in an area that may typically be attributed to the opposite gender than their partner. And that's fine. This isn't some outline for how you MUST be because you've got a penis or a vagina. My son plays with Barbies and dolls; my daughters play with trucks. I'm a workaholic and my husband likes to cook (I abhor cooking and dread it every solitary day). The point isn't that we fit into this One Size Fits All stereotypical box but that we begin to value one another as unique individuals rather than to try to outdo someone because they have different reproductive organs! It's just silly! In the words of my mom, "CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?!"

What I would like to say to kind of wrap up my seemingly oxymoronic thoughts on this is that regardless of the complexity of your unique individual self, whether you happen to be "one of the guys" as a woman or if you're a Metro Sexual male who loves manicures and baking - we need to respect one another. Not outdo one another. Our children are watching us. They need a loving, safe world now more than ever. Be proud to be a woman (or a man if you're a man reading this), but don't lord it over someone of the opposite gender in a battle to outdo one another. This is tearing relationships apart!

I can be feminine and powerful... without crushing men in the process. ROAR!


Susan Sene said...

Great topic! And I agree. I especially cringe when I see commercials that portray the dad as the idiot of the family. Not cool.

BUT...I REALLY like that quote that you mentioned by Ina May Gaskin. I remember reading that when preparing for my vbac with Kaylee. I guess I didn't take it the same way you did. I didn't think it was being negative towards men but rather pointing out that they are proud of "certain" body parts and so a woman should have that same pride and confidence in her uterus because it CAN do what it was designed to do. :)

Anyway, I don't want my daughters thinking men are less inferior by any means - whether that's in the kitchen or in the work force. you're so right, that's not at all equality when you put one gender down! hopefully we can help shape a better perception of what a real man looks like - especially with them having such a great daddy. :)

Joy@WhenDoesDaddyComeHome said...

I agree, Susan! Thanks for the comment. I do like the quote as well. I've seen a ton of stuff lately that just portrays women dominating men and I think seeing the quote again and seeing it in a different way made me take pause. But yes, it is definitely a good thing to be PROUD of the amazing bodies we are blessed with. The uterus truly is an amazing organ!