Wednesday, August 15, 2012

I Don't Want to Forget

Little tidbits from my days that I don't want to forget...

- My eldest daughter, still so young and yet growing so fast! She learned to ride her bike and is so proud of herself. I'm so proud to see her accomplish something that may seem to common to others but when it is your own child you cannot help but beam! To her learning to ride a bike was scary and she overcame those fears. She is growing in her grace. She definitely desires and needs a lot of attention, which I forget at times. So I've been trying to make it a point to give her special hugs and take her aside, even for a few moments, to laugh or whisper something or encourage her. If I don't she acts out negatively and it seems to be a common thread around here lately. My heart is whispering to my brain "Take it slow! There's no rush..."

- Abigail has a heart of gold. She does get sassy and she says what is on her mind (literally and without any regard to social etiquette at times). But she has this desire in her to be a helper, to help the hurting. She has been asking me some of the most intense questions lately, mostly about death. She cried to me that she didn't want to die and asked me if she was going to die. I was stunned and at a loss for words (our neighbor's wife died a few weeks ago). I just hugged her and told her we didn't need to worry about dying and to just focus on having fun and being a kid (I didn't dismiss her and let her share her feelings). Such heavy things on her young heart. And yet she is still this bright ball of sunshine. Her laugh is contagious and she absolutely loves hugs. She is eager to pray and is so eager to learn right now. She has been diving into some of the homeschool stuff already and while she gets discouraged sometimes (like when trying to draw a triangle today) she doesn't give up until she does it. And then she gives a fist pump and says "YEEEESSSSSSS!"

- While playing with Judah and Zoe in Zoe's room tonight: I started tickling Zoe and she laughed and kicked her legs, falling over into a heap on the floor. Once I stopped and she got up, she said in such exasperation, "MOM! You messed up my haiwr!" Then she sighed in frustration as she stomped, in her winter boots no less, over to her table to grab her hairbrush. My oh my! I laughed so hard!

- Judah trying to blow kisses today! Or when asking for kisses and he'll lean in, all open-mouthed, to lick your face! Judah gives "Fives" and is always clapping. He waves bye-bye and hello but I also taught him to turn his hand palm-up instead and do the motion for "come here" (so like an upside down bye-bye). I was telling one of the girls to come to me and Judah lifted his hand in bye-bye, then flipped his hand palm-up instead and began beckoning the girls! He remembered!

- Judah is figuring out toys. He's definitely doing things his sisters didn't do, at least not at this age. He has a VTech riding train that you put blocks in and it will sing songs. He knows how to put the blocks in the little slot. And tonight he was playing with his Roaring Dinosaur (Fisher Price?!) thing and knew where to put the balls. He'll be building towers and doing the shape sorter in no time flat!!!

- Judah's face lighting up like a lightbulb when Elaina walks in. He does it with the other girls, too, but there's a special light just for his biggest sister! She holds him a lot, picks him up without permission (tsk, tsk) and is like his second momma at times, minus the grunt work and diaper changing.

- Judah likes to play soccer! We have a few balls around here, some bouncy and some made out of fabric/yarn. He'll crawl to a ball, hit it with his hand and then go chase it over and over again. Then he'll grab it and squeal and screech in delight before throwing it and going after it again. He also likes to carry toys in his mouth as he crawls!

- Tried getting a shower in but Judah crawled to the bathroom, took one look at the running water I was warming up and tried to crawl into the tub. So I took a shower with him and then Elaina decided to join in. I love the expression on Judah's face as he reaches to touch the water. I got a clean washcloth wet and gave it to him, much to his delight!

- The curled tendril of hair from the sweaty side of Judah's head as I switch sides nursing. The way he fans his hands on my skin. His hands much bigger and more beefy compared to his sisters' hands (all of whom had dainty, slender hands).

- Even though my feet cannot handle the weight of him I stand in the middle of his room tonight, in the dark, rocking him back and forth. I feel his body relax and his eyes are half-closed. I turn a little and the hall light shines on my face. He grins through half open eyes at me. I grin back. He giggles. I giggle. Before I know it we're in the middle of a giggle fit. He understands he's making me laugh and loves it and keeps getting me to laugh, all the while resting in my arms. I don't even notice the pain in my feet, ankles and legs until later when I lean down to lower him into his crib and realize he made me forget. He lays down and falls asleep without a peep, a smile on his lips.

- I guess the littles are tag-teaming tonight because after Judah is in bed Zoe decides she can't go to sleep. I go and see what is the matter. I have a lot to do. Other things going through my mind that I need to get done, a schedule to keep. But it doesn't matter because my baby girl needs me. I pick her up, just like I had been rocking her brother earlier. She's so drowsy, she's fighting it, she's scared to be alone in the dark room even with the hall light on. Mommy's presence and hugs make her feel calm. I start to giggle at her, her eyes riveted on me all the while fighting to keep her eyes open. I start to tell her the things every girl wants and needs to hear. "You're beautiful. You are precious. You have a beautiful smile. You have big princess eyes! You are so so so smart. You make Mommy laugh so much! You are wonderful. You are the King's daughter, you are a princess. You know Mommy loves you very, very much!"

The expression on her face as I whispered these words to her is indescribable and could make me weep. The joy, the love, the gratefulness in her eyes as her smile grew in hearing these words. Lately she has been getting in so much trouble. Lately Mommy has been so distracted. Lately when bedtime hit it was time for everyone to just lay down and go to sleep so "Mommy can get something done around here" (ahhh yes, my humanness just showed itself!). Stopping time, stopping the busyness and just taking those mere minutes to whisper the words my daughter needs to hear is more important to me than all the orders I can fill in record speed.

Today has been one of THOSE days. One of those days I'm proud of myself as a mother. And one of those days I'm so grateful to God that He has given me four of the most precious, beautiful children.

1 comment:

The Mommy said...

I LOVE days like this!
Elaina sounds so much like Maggie these days. We are having lots of issues and I'm trying so hard to be sensitive to her and pull her aside to whisper words of affirmation to her.