Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Falling off!

So... I'm in this weird weight-loss limbo. Nothing fits me correctly. My jeans were literally falling off of me all day long. The crotch of the jeans would slide halfway down to my thighs. If I pull the jeans away from my belly there's a good 3 inches of space. I could even slide them off without unbuttoning them or unzipping them.

BUT trying to put on pants one size down? Forget about it! I just have two words to describe it: muffin top. YUCK! It's not major muffin top but it's enough that I'd rather be baggy at this point. Besides, I'm home all day anyway, so who cares?!

TANGENT: I now wear size LARGE pajama bottoms, whereas when I was a skinny thing I wore mediums (in junior). I was wearing XL. The pajama bottoms Daniel got me for Christmas were a little snug at Christmas and now they fit PERFECT.

Maybe it is just the pairs of jeans that I have. Part of me doesn't want to go spend $20 or more to get some jeans anyway since my goal isn't to wear size 12 jeans. I have a TON of size 10 jeans from after Butterfly was born. But that is it. I have size 16's and size 10's. But alas, it looks like I may need to go buy some "transition" jeans.

The upside to all of this, other than losing weight (DUH), is that I get to thrift a ton of pants that no longer fit! Wahhhhooooo! Last night I started putting together tops and pants that are getting baggy for the thrift store and I felt so liberated!

I don't think my major problem is my waist. I think my major problems are my ghetto rear-end and my chest (I'm short, I need my girls to be smaller!). My ideal waist size should be around 31-32 inches so not much longer to reach that goal.

To figure out your ideal waist size- add up your height in inches. I'm 5'3" so my height in inches is 63. Divide that in half and that should be your target waist size.

So I'm just talking in crazy circles and I'm sure half of this doesn't even make sense. The main point is that pants don't fit me and I need workouts for my bum and chest (other than walking- I don't have a treadmill and it is way too cold for me to walk with the babies).

Can anyone help me? Any workouts to tone down chest and bum?

Here's my lunch from today (just for you, Andrea! You said my posts make you hungry, LOL!):

Does anyone else think cottage cheese is disgusting? I eat it anyway, since it is good for me. But it always taste funky to me, even with pepper!

I've got my protein, little bit of fruit (raisins), vegetable (celery) and dairy. Yum, yum! It was actually very filling.

P.S. Did anyone watch LOST tonight? *GASP*SPUTTER*GASP* Too many twists and turns, answers and questions.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

I'm a Momsicle!

Well hello there dear friends! I am writing to you from an icebox. Okay, so it's just the family room. Our heat turns down to 60 around 10-11PM so I'm a bit chilly. Just a bit!

Right now I'm asking myself a few questions-

1). Why on earth am I not upstairs, cuddled under my warm comforter in 68 degrees of delicious warmth?

2). Why does losing weight hurt and feel so good at the same time?

3). Why does Daniel think shooting people on video games is entertainment and relaxing? I'm stressed out just listening to the gunfire!

4). What on earth am I making for dinner tomorrow?

5). Why am I not in bed yet?

6). Is my nose frozen? Have I turned into a Momsicle?!

I originally got on here over an hour ago to do a workout. Oops. I totally forgot in the midst of reading the bagillion comments I've gotten for the giveaway and chatting it up on a forum about a woman who just gave birth to EIGHT babies (click here)!

Now don't fret! I did do a million crunches........ more than usual anyway.

On other good news, my wedding ring is sliding all over my finger. Being cold is part of it but even when I'm really hot and swollen my wedding ring is loose. This is a major deal to me! I got it re-sized about a year ago because it was a size 6 and I had to "upgrade" to a 7.5. Looks like I'm getting it re-sized again soon! I'm going to wait until I lose more weight first, though.

Waist- 34.5" (.5" loss)
Hip- 40.5" (.5" loss)
Rt. Thigh- 20.5" (1.5" loss)
Lft. Thigh- 20.5" (2" loss)
Rt. Calf- 14.75" (1" loss)
Lft. Calf- 15" (.75" loss)
Rt. Bicep- 11.75" (.75" loss)
Lft. Bicep- 12" (no change)
Neck- 13.75" (.25" loss)
Butt- 42.75" (.25" loss)
Chest- 39" (3" loss)

Subtotal: 10 1/2 inches!

Wow, so my biggest loss was in my breasts. In three weeks I've lost 10 1/2 inches. My jeans today were literally falling off of me. I could pull them down without unbuttoning them.

I still have a long way to go but this really motivates me!

Last weigh-in was 184.5 lbs. I'm hoping that by Saturday I'm 179! I want to be in the 170's!!!

Friday, January 23, 2009


Are you a parent? A mother to small children? It is one thing to go into public with one child (unless said child happens to be, ummm, less than manageable on outings) and quite another to go out into public with more than one.

Every single time I go out with the kids, without any other adult, I come home ready to pull my hair out. It's a constant barrage of "Don't touch that," "Stop whining," and "If you don't knock it off I'm taking you home!" I probably say the word "Don't" a gazillion times. I get stares, lots and lots of stares.

So today I used my best playing card. The promise of the golden arches and a playground of tubes and slides. Oh yes, we went to Mc.Donalds. A few blocks away from the place of happy meals and french fries I kept arguing with myself in my head about it and trying to decide if I was going to skip lunch or indulge in some warm, salty fries.

My craving won out! I ordered everything SMALL and got lemonade instead of pop (or as many of you like to say "soda"). Well I just entered the nutritional information into my tracker and guess what! My entire Mc.Donald's meal, including lemonade, was only 553 calories. The fat for it all was 25 (but I have an allotment of 32-56 a day).

I haven't gone over my calories OR my fat intake for the day and I still got to indulge a little. It's been months since I've been there and I was nervous for my bowels but so far, so good! The kiddos got to run around and play at the indoor playground, too.

Funny story- There was this group of women there with their kids. All of them had newborns or were pregnant and they had older children (no older than 7 or 8). They were talking about homeschooling and conversion minivans. I felt like I was eavesdropping on a very posh Mommy Circle. And these women seemed to do it all! Homeschool, field trips, play dates, having newborns and no sleep and no sex... wow, I think I found Super Mom's playgroup. I could tell who the "head honcho" was of the group, too.

Very, very interesting to say the least! But they were also very gossipy about some mothers that weren't there for the date so definitely not feeling envious. Don't they realize that when they're the ones missing a playdate (unless they ARE Super Mom, then that would never happen) that their sex lives and parenting skills are being rated by their "friends" as well? If you talk with a talker, chances are that talker talks with others about you too!

Monday, January 19, 2009

The best ever!

I'm currently eating lunch and I am eating one of the best sandwiches I've had in a long time! Turkey, white American cheese, tomato and avocado (*no mayo or mustard or anything like that) on a bakery bun. And yes, I had taken a bite before I snapped the picture! Mmm, I love avocados! And yeah, there is turkey on there, it just got shoved under all the veggies (tomato=fruit?)!

I haven't worked out yet today. After the weekend it is hard to get back in the saddle! On Saturday I rode the stationary bike because I knew we were going out to dinner. Ha ha! Wanted to burn some calories, ya know?

We ended up going to M.imi's C.afe and I have to admit I might not go there again except for their F.rench O.nion S.oup. It just wasn't very good and I don't know if it is because it has been awhile since we ate out or if their food truly is not that great. I just know that I've tried many dishes there and I haven't liked any of it. Just the soup!

Anyway, I only ate half of my burger. When we left I felt like a bloated blimp. UGH! I don't think I WANT to eat out again anytime soon. I felt like everything- my butt, thighs, stomach- swelled up. I felt greasy and gross, too. And it made me feel incredibly tired, like the burger sucked up my energy. I just know I went home and felt uncomfortable, gross, and swollen.

I looked up the nutrition information on the burger since I am charting my food right now and there were 1478 calories in the burger alone (not counting fries). There were 105 grams of FAT!

According to my sparkpeople nutrition chart, based on my weight, height, and amount of weight to lose--- I'm supposed to get 1,200-1,550 calories A DAY and less than 52 grams of fat. WOW! It's a huge eye-opener when you chart your food. I've been doing good with getting about 1,200-1,300 calories a day so far.

We had a wonderful date. I have a hard time on dates because I feel there's all this pressure to make conversation (which I'm not good at). And because Daniel is my husband he already knows what I'm up to and vice versa. We try to stay off the subject of religion, politics, money, and our kids (aka all the stress-inducing topics) when on a date.

So I just relaxed and let things flow. We ended up just being big flirts and joking around. I kept teasing him about Mardi Gras (M.imi's C.afe is decorated with Mardi Gras flair) because he's going on the annual missions trip this year and I want to go SO BADLY! But alas, we have children and Mardi Gras isn't necessarily family-friendly.

We also saw the movie "M.all C.op" and it was a riot! We laughed so incredibly hard during that movie. K.evin J.ames reminds me of Daniel so much it's almost scary. Or is it that Daniel reminds me of K.evin J.ames?

Thank you guys for your sweet comments about the previous post, with the baby items. The reason I felt silly was because I didn't want people to think I am so obsessive. The stuff is still sitting on my dresser, too. So much for packing it away! I'm slowly working my way upstairs, cleaning-wise.

Anyway, that is what is up with me! I'm 4-lbs lighter (well, maybe not after my disgusting burger) and feeling good today! I'm going to work on getting my workout in. I used to worry about having a set time to get it done in, but the reality is that life gets in the way sometimes and it doesn't matter WHEN... what matters is that it DOES happen.

Friday, January 16, 2009

I feel so silly!

In December I struck up a trade arrangement on Etsy. As you all know I am a seller on there. Every now and then I love doing a trade in which another seller and I trade for items of equal value. I was approached by someone with a baby shop and eagerly decided to trade with them.

Now I originally had this set in mind for someone else. But a lot of people are keeping their baby names secret so I had no clue who to get the set for because you need a baby name for it. I had already sent off the items they had traded for so she was waiting on my decision for the set. So I decided to just give it to myself since I know what I want. And now I feel just plain silly after opening the box (it arrived tonight).

Isn't it darling? Three very nice burp cloths, three very nice bibs, and a beautiful blue blanket all monogrammed with the name Caiden. It all came in a pretty little basket that they're all placed in.

I'm not obsessive. I just had a deadline and needed to give her a name so we could complete our trade. Nonetheless, after opening the box, I feel like that happy little monogrammed baby face is mocking me. So this beautiful little set will be carefully boxed back up and wait in a closet for the day it can burp, swaddle, and feed a little boy.

I caught Daniel carefully touching the stitches of the name before squaring his shoulders and walking out of our room. I don't know if he just wanted to touch it or if he felt the same as me. We're stowing away things for a baby we don't even have.

But, if we ever do have a boy he'll know how very much loved he was before he was even conceived. That we loved him while he was still just a dream in our hearts. Or as the saying goes, "... a twinkle in his daddy's eye!"

If you are pregnant and interested in getting one of these gorgeous sets or you need a baby shower gift idea you can visit the artist's shop HERE. I noticed she didn't have this exact gift set up so you can contact her about it and I know she'll love to get a set made for you!

Goodbye 4 pounds!

This is just a QUICK update as the timer for dinner is about to go off.

I weighed myself a day early (we weigh-in for our challenge on Saturday).

I have lost 4 lbs!


Never to come back again!!! Goodbye poundage!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Long time, no see!

Exactly 53 days since the miscarriage AF finally came. Eight stinking weeks of torture and wondering and waiting. And it's finally over, finally at an end. I feel a mixture of relief, for being able to move on, and of sadness because I should've been 15 weeks pregnant by now.

But I'm doing good. I'm not in pain or anything. I'm trying to allow myself to feel emotions in the moment, instead of what I think I should be feeling. Grieving can take a long time.

And of course I'm thinking about how I got pregnant with Bumble Bee immediately after my first cycle with my previous miscarriage. How Bumble Bee was born within days of the date I found out I was pregnant with the little one I miscarried. Wow, that is kind of a confusing statement but you get it, I hope.

Anyway, still staying focused on working out and changing my life. I am a person of little self control in certain areas, which is probably my weakest attribute. I have to stay motivated. I have to change. I'm known to change my mind like the wind changes direction. While I do want another baby, I also want to change who I am.

And like I said before, if it happens then it'll happen and we'll be blessed and ecstatic! But for now I'm waiting for the numbers on the scale to go down before actively getting on the TTC Bandwagon again. If I can reach HALF my goal before the springtime then I'll totally jump back on.

Monday, January 12, 2009

I really thought I was..!

Yesterday I drank 12 glasses of water. (!!!)

My skin looks amazing today. And it has give me sooooooo much energy! I really thought I was doing the healthy thing. I really thought I was on top of my game and wondered why I wasn't losing weight/inches. Every single day found me fatigued, worn out, unable to get the smallest TO DO list done.

But today I've been so energetic that I am astounded. I seriously cannot believe HOW GOOD I feel. And it's been a long time. Too long! (It's honestly because of the water, too, so if you feel sluggish, drink more water!)

A few weeks ago, someone (*pointed look at Daniel*) spilt orange drink in the fridge. I kept putting it off and putting it off because I was too tired to clean it. How pathetic that is to think about! But at least I'm not worrying about it anymore. Why? Because the first thing I did this morning, other than feed the kids breakfast and eat breakfast myself, was to scrub the kitchen and the fridge.

One of the motivators for me cleaning out the fridge (other than it was DISGUSTING) was a challenge I got. I've joined two social networks to help me lose weight. The first is SparkPeople and the second is a forum at MedHelp.

The challenge was to clean out your fridge of junk or "empty calories". Most of the time when you think you're hungry, you're actually thirsty. So always drink a glass of water *before* you eat.

Thankfully I really didn't have much to throw out because I usually keep the fridge stocked with the healthy stuff. I mainly threw out expired stuff, to be honest. So I'm very proud of that! My freezer is probably the culprit of junk. But I will clean that and probably not post about it.

Look out how much my fridge gleamed after cleaning her out! If you ever spill something sticky the TRICK is to heat up water in the microwave or stovetop and carefully pour it over the spill. It wiped up like magic.

So I put everything back in the fridge! Milk, water, Simply Orange OJ, natural applesauce, tupperware of fruit, Yoplait Light yogurt, carrots, celery, apples, eggs, and 100% apple juice (no added sugar), tortillas, leftover Prego sauce, cheese, lean deli meat... Bare, but at least it is healthy!

So I want to challenge you to clean out your fridge. Not because it might be dirty. What I mean is to clean it out of the junk (and expired stuff! LOL!) so that you can re-evaluate what you're family is eating.

The more processed foods you have, the worst off you are. I have a hard time eating fresh fruits and vegetables but if that is all we have, then that is all I eat! If you have cravings for something sweet, pudding cups and fudge bars are great to have in moderation!

I realize most of you are pregnant, but healthy eating for your child starts now. So I extend the challenge to all of you as well! I'd love to see fridge shots of before-and-afters so let me know if you do this! And let me remind you- one of the reasons I weigh 50 lbs more than I used to is because I ate absolute crap when I was pregnant with Elaina. I learned my lesson, for sure! I took pregnancy to be an excuse to be reckless and irresponsible with my body and here I am today, still fighting it almost 4 years later.


I want to talk about SparkPeople for a minute. All of these weight loss websites charge you money to use their websites and trackers. SparkPeople is completely free and very well setup!

You can track
-your water intake
-all the foods you eat (it will add up calories/fat/carbs for you with what YOU need for you age/weight/height)
-your exercise (will tell you how many calories you burned for each activity)
-they have exercise workouts for you to do, with details on how to properly do a move
-communities (like I'm in one for women TTC and for Christians)
-RECIPES with ratings from other members and the nutrition info. and you can keep your own "recipe box" on there. When you save a recipe, it will go to your recipe box!!! How cool is that?!

It's really cool. Strange to navigate but once you get the hang of it it's amazing. IF YOU JOIN- please use JoyRenee as your referral and look me up on there. That's my username. You can join while you're pregnant, too, I think.

By using the food tracker I realized something important. I wasn't getting ENOUGH calories! When you do not get enough calories your body goes into survival mode and you end up storing fat, not burning it.

So not only have I started drinking more water, I've started eating more (and healthy). So I definitely have a ton of energy. I'm not tired by lunchtime anymore and I can do my workouts and then some! My house is once again spotless. For a while there it was getting a little out-of-control because I was too tired to do more than a few things a day.

My MIL is giving me her stationary bike, too, which I'm so excited about! Especially on those days I just can't get outside to walk. I have no clue where to put it, though.

And finally--- AF still has not shown. And I'm okay with that at this point. All of the exercise and the lifestyle changing could have definitely affected that. At this point I'm actually fine with not getting pregnant. I cannot revolve my life around that one goal or focus anymore. It's just too disheartening and stressful.

Instead I'm just living and loving life right now. I feel SO good right now that it is insane. I've never felt like this before... because I've never lived like this before. And once I start getting better sleep it's only going to get better. I can't imagine feeling better than I feel right now.

So recap:

1). I challenge you to clean out your fridge of junk and stock it will healthy stuff!
2). Join, even if you are pregnant.
3). No AF (annoying but somewhat understandable)
4). Don't mind if we conceive or not because right now I'm so blessed and happy with where I'm at in life! If it happens, it happens! If not, I'm losing weight and feeling great! Oh my, that should be my motto.

I really thought I was already eating healthy. I really thought I drank enough water. And I really thought I should've lost a ton of weight these past months. Now I realize that I was wrong and I'm ready to change!

Monday, January 5, 2009

Blankety Blank

It's going on 7 weeks since the m/c and still no AF. I swear there were moments it was going to start. Instead there was a little bit of EWCM (<----- handy dandy key on left sidebar). I'll give myself a few more days but then I think I might test again just to be sure.

This past weekend I didn't really workout. We had so much going on that I never had enough time to workout and shower. So I made up a TO DO list last night, ready to tackle the house. Except when I woke up this morning I was feeling really ill, flu-like. I'm fine now and got a few things crossed off the TO DO list.

My TO DO? I love looking at people's lists so here's mine:
  • Go through medical bills, make payments, balance book
  • Make grocery list (add 9V and AA batteries)
  • Dishes
  • Finish uploading items to new Etsy shop
  • Get orders made and shipped/create new jewelry
  • Sort kid toys and cat toys
  • Get thrift bag(s) together
  • Workout & shower
  • Sort through movies
  • Clean out junk drawers
  • Measure fabric for Lindee
  • Go through old magazines
  • Straighten up 3rd Story
  • Vacuum and mop
  • Make spaghetti for dinner
  • Laundry

I guess I should add "Go to store and buy another test" to the list. Not obsessing but definitely wanting to make sure because I'd need to take the progesterone as a precaution. Will keep y'all posted if and when I decide to test.

On a positive note, look at the new feature in the left-hand sidebar. I started a list of measurements. In almost a month I've lost ONE INCH off my waist! And 1 1/2 INCHES off my butt! That doesn't seem like much but remember, this was over the holidays and I just started, not to mention the scale is not budging. I'm *toning* which is awesome in my book! TWO-AND-A-HALF inches gone!

I also added more detailed measurements so I could know a total inches lost. If anyone else has a list like this, I'd love to see it!