So today I was weighed and let me just say the result has left me feeling absolutely horrible and even depressed. The person who weighed me wasn't a jerk about it or anything BUT they did show me a "growth chart" like you see at the pediatrician's office. She said, "Well you weren't tiny to begin with... but we want you to gain 15 lbs total. You've gained 21 lbs thus far."
Well bite me.
I'm doing what I can. I'm not eating like a pig, though I did just have a bout of emotional eating because I thought, "What the H?! Might as well!"
I've never ever had a weight issue that left me feeling this way. And I hate being made to feel guilty, as though I'm doing something wrong when I'm actually trying to do everything right. It's not like we can do anything about it anyway! And more weight IS probably coming.
I've always been that person who was annoyed about pregnant women complaining about their expanding waistlines and here I am doing the same thing. Sorry, I really am. But I am a person who has to be honest with their feelings. I am not any less grateful for being pregnant, for having Zoe. This is purely a self-image thing that actually doesn't have anything to do with actually BEING pregnant. They just happen to be coinciding at this time.
FYI- I weighed in at exactly 200 lbs today. I used to weigh 130 once upon a time and thought that was fat. Oh how naive I was!!!
To top that off I got really angry with Daniel tonight, probably partly due to my already cranky crankiness. So I'm just feeling completely pathetic and unattractive right now, all by myself, because he got to go out and get out of the house.
So that is my whiny, emotional post for the year.