Thursday, April 30, 2009

Nursery Pics So Far

A lot of people keep commenting on how quickly and early I'm getting the nursery done. In my defense I'm doing this all alone and I'd prefer to do it before I'm so large that I run major risks of falling off the ladder. My husband is not skilled with a paintbrush! Ha ha! But it's very therapeutic for me and I love it.

Here's a sequence of pictures with commentary. Still lots to go but over halfway done. Painting should be done tomorrow. Hopefully get the chair rail within the next couple weeks (need to double-check measurements). Enjoy!

This picture showcases that I got the trim and lower half of the wall painted. Debating on whether or not to paint the closet door. Blue curtains will be used if we're having a boy- that's the accent color! Love it!

Started painting with a "cream" that was way too white. And you can see I couldn't figure out where to put the chair rail.

My sister told me chair rail is 36 inches above baseboard! So helpful and I got it measured and painted correctly... with my NEW cream color that is actually CREAM.

Started spackling and painting around the spackling. Loving the colors together!

So much better! Here's all three colors together, waiting for the chair rail.

I'll be finishing the walls tomorrow. I have to sand the walls where I spackled and then roll away.

My daughters have taken to breaking the blades off their mini-blinds. We only have mini-blinds in the childrens' bedrooms because they have sheer curtains. Well no more! I bought new, thick panels for their room which will keep them from breaking mini-blinds and keep the sun at bay longer in the mornings. Don't have a picture as they're sleeping right now but coming soon...

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Boring Over Here!

I've run out of steam and have absolutely no inspiration for a post. I'm just blindly typing here. I'm in the waiting phase. Waiting for my next appt. and the mid-pregnancy ultrasound to make sure baby's healthy. Waiting for Elaina's upcoming birthday!

Okay I finally thought of something to talk about. Cloth versus Disposable! A lot of people have noticed my Diaper Tally on the left sidebar and asked about it. It's a tally for disposable diapers.

My husband won't let me do cloth after I was conned out of almost $500 when I ordered from what WAS a reputable seller who went AWOL and ended up stealing money from other people at the same time. So it's out of the question and I still feel burned from the whole experience. Never got my money back, in case you're wondering, because I wrote a check.

I'm VERY environmentally conscious. I have been recycling since I was a child and our city has a free recycling program. EVERY little piece of paper, no matter how small, goes in the bin. If it's a little insert in a package I take it out to recycle it. If I see someone throw a pop can or plastic into the trash I actually will collect it to put in a recycle bin!

I watch our water consumption (in regards to washing, not drinking). I use reusable water bottles. We keep our lights and TV off all day long and unplug unused appliances. We use the wonderful energy-saving lightbulbs. Among other things...

My mom always said to me I was born in the wrong era. I was the little girl who would cry over endangered animals and beg my mom to help them. I would line-dry our clothes when I was younger, too. I really want to get a line in our backyard sometime to use even less energy. I spent every moment I could outside in the trees and my love for nature is what led me to Wicca, which is a WHOLE other story. I'm a Christian now for those who may get confused by that revelation.

So most people might think that I'd be all for cloth diapering. There are actually two sides to cloth diapering- while keeping diapers out of landfills water consumption sky rockets. It comes down to wanting to reduce landfills or reducing water consumption when droughts may be in our future.

We have chosen to use disposable diapers. But I applaud every single person out there who uses cloth diapers. My hat is seriously off to you guys and I admire it incredibly!

I've been thinking a lot about breastfeeding lately as well. Perhaps that will be tomorrow's topic! I have a lot to say on that topic so I bid you all adieu.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Can I get a T? Can I get an I?

Can I get an R? an E? a D?! What's that spell?!

I have to admit that I'm actually getting really tired of using aliases for my kids' names. I can't tell you how many times I write an entire post filled with their real names only to go back and have to change them. I feel it's more confusing too. And can I just say I knew I would probably change my mind about using nicknames? Most of you know their names anyway.

Plus their names are so stinking beautiful. My main concern, when I decided to give them nicknames, was really protecting pictures. Now that I feel better about the picture security I want to re-introduce you to my daughters.

Elaina has been known as Miss Butterfly. She's turning 4 in a couple of months. Favorite color is pink... and red... and blue... and green... and purple! She loves cheese and pickles and carbs!

Abigail has been known as Bumble Bee. She just turned 2 a month ago. Favorite color seems to be blue. She loves pizza, just about any fruit and PBJ.

So there you have it. My beautiful girls. And I can finally write about them without beating my brains to remember their nicknames. I'm sure y'all will be relieved yourselves!

Which also means I can talk about baby names, too. Most of you already know but for those of you that don't here are our baby names:

Caiden Isaac
Zoe Beth

We may change up Zöe Beth because it's not flowing like I want it to. Someone suggested my middle name so the name would be Zöe Renée which I think looks pretty and flows better. Not sure and probably won't decide until we know the gender!

Renée means "Reborn" or "Born again" and Zöe means "Life". So Reborn-Life after all this infertility nonsense. Very French, too, which I love. I took French for 5 years in school, though I've forgotten most of it. I could probably pick it back up really fast but like that is going to happen anytime soon! Ha ha!

But we're stuck on Caiden Isaac. I am so in love with this name and even though it is growing in popularity it's OUR son, if and whenever we have one. Caiden means "Spirit of Battle" which makes me think of spiritual warfare. Isaac means "Laughter" as many of us know from the Old Testament.

Isaac is actually after Daniel because someone prophesied over him, while he was still in his mother's womb, that he would be as an Isaac unto her. And he has been. When Daniel's not in the house you can feel it! It's quiet, people are somber... but once he enters it is loud and people are laughing until they're peeing themselves. Daniel IS laughter so we want to pass that part of him down since I don't want to actually name a child Daniel or Keith (his middle name). I can't call my son Daniel because that's what I call the man I love and sleep with. Just weirds me out but is cool for other people who have juniors (like my brother).

And when Daniel's mom was going through cancer treatments he'd make her laugh until she fell off the couch or was in so much pain from laughing. He would make up "characters" and do voices and impersonations that would get her laughing like crazy. I think that is such a special bond that he has with his mom, during her most vulnerable time.

Anywho, that was long-winded and took me 1 1/2 hours to write! I kept getting distracted.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Week 15!

So my baby is about 4 inches long now (about the size of a navel orange). We have an upcoming appointment next week and I'm so eager to hear the heartbeat again!

Tonight Daniel and I watched some Stargate, after the girls were in bed. Now he is not the type of guy that likes to touch my belly when I'm pregnant. When I was pregnant with each of our girls I had to hold the guy's hand down on my stomach to feel them move. I've found that many men are like this, so I didn't feel too horrible.

But tonight he reaches over and just rests his hand there and says, "What are you doing in there, baby?!" Oh it was just so sweet and melted my heart! Not to mention how good it felt when he gently rubbed my belly (my aching ligaments!).

And when he saw a baby on television he actually said, "Look at that baby! He's SOOO cute!" I am thinking that maybe he is experiencing couvade! Ha ha! He's been weepy, eating, fatigued... No matter what it is he's making me fall in love with him all over again. Nothing makes a woman melt faster than a man who takes care of pregnant women and babies!

Today was a lazy, rainy day. The girls and I took a nap together on my bed. I was squished in the middle and couldn't move. Very hard for a pregnant body that needs to move frequently! I wish I could've freezed time. Even though I was exhausted I spent a long time staring at my girls and brushing their hair with my fingers. I love watching them sleep!

Bumble Bee woke first. She had moved away from me in her sleep but once she woke up she whimpered and got as close to me as she possibly could, tucking her sweet head under my chin. When Butterfly woke up the first thing she said was, "[Bumble Bee] do you want to eat a snack?"

Symptoms lately: soreness everywhere, back pain, peeing a lot, fatigue, dizziness. I'm trying to drink enough water. I feel like maybe I'm not getting enough even though I drink a ton.

My belly is getting rounder and more firm. I think my butt is too.

Alright I'm off to pee and drink more water.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Birthing Options

This just may become a mini-series on my blog as I sort through all the information I'm soaking up like a sponge. And it may become long, so bear with me. I've been following a few L&D nurse blogs- ones that I find incredibly empowering and informative. You can find them on the right-hand sidebar at the bottom.

My first two births were strikingly similar in many ways. A lot of interventions were used that were never even needed. For those of you who aren't aware, or don't have a Birth Plan, you have these huge bands wrapped around your belly. One to measure baby's heartbeat and the other to measure contractions. They will put a blood pressure cuff on your arm and leave it there (it will automatically measure your BP at intervals). You'll have an IV placed right away as well.

You'll be left in your room like that. As your contractions get harder you'll get really hot and the worst thing when you're hot is to have all this STUFF on you. Did I mention that you're also easily agitated when you reach the final stages of labor and your sense of touch is on overdrive.

So my hope is to... :

♥ ... labor at home longer before I go in. We'll call Daniel's parents to take our girls, of course. It is actually encouraged to labor at home as long as you can because once you enter the hospital you will have many interventions (breaking the water, Pitocin, etc.) unless you have a Birth Plan stating otherwise or it is deemed medically necessary.

I am finding out that many laboring women are treated the same, instead of as unique individuals with different needs.

♥ ... to avoid unnecessary interventions if possible, or at least hold off on them. Like having all these things all over me the whole time- I am very sensitive to touch and get easily agitated if that sense goes into overdrive. Some things, like monitoring the baby, are required for a certain amount of time and I have no problem with that. Once that required period is over, and all is well, I want to be free to...

♥ ... walk, slow dance with Daniel (helps with back pain and contractions), try a shower/bath, etc. I may end up asking for an epidural. My labors come hard and fast. My babies are born usually within 3-4 hours of having the water broken.

Because I am a "seasoned" birther I can reflect on previous experience and get a feeling for what may be similar in this upcoming birth. I feel more comfortable laboring at home for awhile. And I know that I want to be in the hospital when my water breaks.

I'm not trying to start controversy or tell anyone how to birth. I am merely trying to sort through my feelings about how I would like my personal experience to be (pending there are no probs- I understand things happen and I am all for emergency intervention).

I'm not a hippie who doesn't believe in modern medicine. Quite the contrary! I love labor and birth. I love hospitals. I love the entire experience! And I can't wait to see how this little one makes their grand entrance into the world... in a hospital (no home births here).

I've even entertained the idea of a water birth but I don't think that's an option at my hospital and I don't like the idea of sitting in my own blood and fluids. But water births are so much better and easier on the baby. I watched a video of the most peaceful water birth. Baby just laid in the water, as though sleeping, as the mom held him. There were no screams, bright lights, coldness, being rubbed down with a rough blanket, etc. It was very, very beautiful.

What about you? It may be early to think about the labor and birth (especially as a first-time mommy who doesn't know what to expect) so I encourage you to read the nursing blogs I'm following. Each has her own style and philosophies, which I love. Knowledge is power, so read up and good luck deciding how you'd like your birth to go. Nothing is ever set in stone and may not happen the way you envision but it's good to have an idea of what you want going in!

Here are some helpful articles I've recently read that may make you laugh and also help you sort through your own feelings about how you would like to create a birth plan!

It's Your Birth Right!
Top Ten Lists (funny/informative)
Birth Stories from the 70's

Friday, April 24, 2009

Feeling Bad!

When I think about all the times my kids don't obey, ask incessant questions over and over (especially when I'm busy), make enormous messes, back-talk, hurt one another...

I start to feel badly!

Because I was the same exact way with my parents.

Mom, Dad--- so sorry you had to put up with me! Now all those nights you "needed a break" made perfect sense. Nothing says, "I UNDERSTAND NOW" then having your own children who seem to naturally replicate exactly how you acted when you were a child.

I was just telling someone the story about how my dad found me na.ked in our neighbor's backyard, swinging away on their swingset, at Butterfly's age. He laughs to tell it now but I'm sure back then he freaked, wondering what pervs were out there watching or how many other parents were shaking their head at him in judgement.

And there were all the times I called 911 when I was a preschooler. And the times I made pets out of slugs and snails and kept them in room. Or the time I cracked eggs into my sister's alarm clock. In fact, I had a strange fascination with eggs! I tried to incubate eggs by laying them in the baskets full of clean laundry and sitting on them.

There were also countless times I got into makeup. One time I put a maxi pad on when I was really young (this was before they had ultra-thins!) because I had seen my mom do it. That one got an enormous laugh at my mom at least! Not to mention the times I threw major fits in the store and my mom would leave her full shopping cart, in tears, and drag us back home.

Then there are the times I did some dangerous things. One of which was sticking my tongue to a frozen pole. Don't ask! I was very young. And I was outside by myself. I got so scared I ripped my tongue off the pole- literally. There was a large chunk of my tongue ripped out of my mouth (and yes, it did grow back, but without taste buds).

Or the time I kicked a neighbor's German Shepherd [on accident] because it walked in front of the swing and the dog bit my leg and I had to go to the ER.

I gave my momma lots of grey hairs.

So this post is dedicated to all the "grandparents" out there. Those times you said, "Just wait... just you wait until you have kids of your own" were greeted with eye rolls. But now they ring true. Thank you for not saying, "I told you so!" Your silent smirks say it enough. Ha ha!

I finally remembered a cute Butterfly saying so I'm adding it here before I forget again. Last Sunday she got to hold her new cousin. I could tell her arms were starting to feel weak from trying to hold his head up so I put my arms under hers to give her support.

I said, "He's heavy, isn't he? Are your arms getting tired?"

She replied, "No, my arms are happy!"

Boo's Cut

Because Boo (aka Butterfly) likes to have her hair up a lot I hardly have any pictures of her with her hair down. I finally found one from a week ago. So here is a BEFORE SHOT:

And here are AFTER shots (courtesy of my FIL who has an amazing camera!):

I had a lot of fun cutting her hair. But I did slip and accidently snipped her chin because she had turned her head. I reacted before she did! I threw down the scissors and the comb and grabbed her in a hug, apologizing profusely before she could cry out. Thankfully there was no bleeding and all was well. And she looks cute to boot!

You can see the red in her hair in these pictures. She had reddish-brown-blonde hair when she was born, a color that people pay money to have done to their own. I love this girl!

She was saying some pretty hysterical stuff today. I kept trying to repeat it in my mind to replay later but alas I only remember one of the funny things she had said.

She came up to me and said, "Daddy? Errrr--- Mommy?! Whatever your name is!" before dissolving into giggles.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Take Me to Mexico!

I feel I had hardly any real food aversions when pregnant with my girls. The occasional slab of meat would gross me out, but I could still eat it. And I could eat hotdogs and pasta and cheese.

No longer. Now it is a battle every single mealtime to find something I can eat. I finally realized that I...

-drink OJ like there's no tomorrow
-drink enormous amounts of milk (probably to make up for protein)
-really, really want Mexican food all the time (crunchy tacos and Mexican rice!)

I've also realized...

-any meat (other than what's hiding in a taco) makes me gag
-I can't stand pasta
-that if a sandwich isn't on a bakery bun you can forget it

I hate being so selective because it limits my choices incredibly. What's funny is I keep telling myself, "Once the baby is born you can eat a foot-long hotdog loaded with ketchup!" I'm usually not so stingy on what I eat (pre-pregnancy) unless it's fattening or comes in a box (Hamburger Helper, for example- sooooo gross)!

I haven't talked about the girls in awhile. Butterfly has become a singing sensation! She makes up songs and sings them. One song she sings is, "All the trees of the fields will clap their hands!" I think it's a song her Nonna taught her which is a line from a Psalm. I can't remember the words to the other ones but they make me giggle as I eavesdrop from another room.

When we were walking yesterday we walked by some trees that had millions of purple blossoms. Butterfly said, "Ohhhhh, Mom! That tree has a beautiful gown!"

Bumble Bee's vocabulary and clarity is starting to become scary! She's not a baby anymore. She can talk, she can express herself and tell me what she needs. Some of my favorites that she is saying:

"Mom, yook at my baby [doll]! Baby cryin'. Baby sad!"
"I did it!!!" -said with a LOT of enthusiasm
"Take a bath! With bubbus?!"
"I want via-min." (aka vitamin)
"Stop it." -she says this so clearly I crack up everytime

She still has such a baby face to me but can talk very clearly at times. Her pediatrician also commented how funny it was that her face still has it's baby-ness because she's very tall for her age.

Both girls are still excited about baby. We don't talk about baby, though, unless one of the girls brings baby up. Which is usually everyday. When I sit down to eat Butterfly says, "The baby is eating with their belly button in your tummy?"

When I lay down because I don't feel well Butterfly will say, "The baby is making you sick?" I never know what to say about that one because I don't want her to feel that the baby is hurting her mom and develop animosity. So sometimes I just say, "When you grow a baby in your tummy it is hard work. It makes you tired and not feel good sometimes."

Bumble Bee never talks about the baby on her own. But if it's the topic of conversation her question is usually limited to, "Baby in your tummy? Baby in a bubbus?" (She always tells me that the baby is in a bubble, which is actually somewhat accurate- they're in a sac that resembles a bubble). She says that because of my 3D floating baby on here. It looks like it is floating in a bubble!

And Bumble Bee has switched over to the other side. She says baby is a boy! She says 'boy' really cute. Almost like 'boing' without the -ng. I keep going back-and-forth. I've had a lot, a LOT, of baby boy dreams. And I usually refer to baby as him. I don't know how women could stand waiting until birth to find out their baby's gender- I admire that!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Not much

I'm definitely feeling more energy lately. I feel I get more done, but mostly at the expense of my lower back. That is my one and only complaint because as a mom of younger children it is so much harder to keep up with them when it feels like someone has taken a dagger to your spinal cord.

The day started out a little cool so I was surprised, after naptime, to find it was splendedly warm outside. We ventured into the yard and something strange caught my eyes. Butterfly's hair!

She had a chunk of hair hanging longer than her usual length. It hadn't been there earlier so I have no idea what happened. I pulled her closer and this chunk of hair is tangled into a knot at the back of her head. The only conclusion is that she was doing acrobats while taking a nap! She had a bath and her hair brushed beforehand without incident. So very weird.

Anyway because that kind of freaked me out and I couldn't untangle the tangle, I decided to cut Butterfly's hair. We sat outside in the sunshine and snipped away her beautiful hair. She's so happy with the result and looks so very cute! It's a simple bob; I'm no beautician. But pretty good if I do say so myself. Now if only I could remember to schedule my hair appointment so I can look equally as cute!

I'll post pics when my FIL sends them to me. He got some CUTE pics of her when we walked over to show off her new do.

Last night Daniel and I watched Fireproof and while I am not a personal fan of Kirk Cameron he actually did a very good job. The movie was emotionally intense. There were times I felt embarassed watching; as though I were a guest in someone's living room while they had a major fight and praying I could just sneak out the door!

Was the film quality and acting A-List? No, but that didn't matter. It made it seem even more real to be honest, and I have a problem with sub-par acting. We laughed, we cried (yes, Daniel cried more than I did!), we bit our nails in suspense. I recommend it, Christian or not, because everyone can relate and learn from it. I'm a Christian who has a tendency to make fun of some Christian movies because of the acting/filming but this is definitely one I recommend.

We have some stressful things going on right now. One of which is The City (nickname we call KC) is cracking down on people to keep up the exterior of their homes in the historical neighborhoods. Yay- this is great news! Many houses look really, really bad.

Unfortunately one of those houses is ours. We bought this house as a foreclosure so it was sold as-is. We have done a lot of work inside and hardly any outside. The roof is beautiful, which is a relief. Though we did have to do the "back roof" about a year ago because it was looking bad. I could go on and on about what we have done but of course The City only cares about the exterior and what is not done.

So our list of To Do before MAY 1st?!

-Replace missing shake shingles
-Repaint entire house (did I mention it is 3 stories?)
-Replace soffit/fascia
-Replace gutters

May 1st happens to be less than 2 weeks away. We haven't done a single thing. We can't afford to do a single thing, even with our tax return, because our house is 3 stories high; which means renting scaffolding. And they have to be done in a particular order. We definitely qualify for grant money but no one is calling us back. Thankfully The City will work with those who are at least trying to get their houses in shape. They understand the economy is bad. They just need to CALL US back!

The stress is eating away at my husband. Their letter was pretty harsh. "Get this done or you'll go to jail and pay $1000 fine and $50 everyday past the deadline that it isn't complete." We love our house and I am so excited to have the exterior completely re-done and freshly painted. Just how and when and with what moolah is weighing us down.

So let it be a lesson to all! Buying a 100-year-old foreclosed house very inexpensive can be fun... if you have the money to fix up the outside!

Monday, April 20, 2009

Week 14?!?!

*Writing this post for tomorrow, you lucky ones who read it early!*

T-minus 6 weeks (or less) to the gender scan! I hope baby cooperates and shows us their goods. Regardless I begged Daniel to let me do a 3D ultrasound and he complied so we should know at some point. It's become a tradition for us to do the 3D scan. And guess what! Each time we have a child the price increases. Stupid economy.

We usually do the 3D scan around 26-28 weeks so that's a few months away. I really like the place we go to. They have a huge TV screen and a couch so many family members can come and enjoy. They tape the entire sonogram and give unlimited sepia and B&W pictures of baby.

My cat has become obsessed with me. For those of you who have never been introduced to Beckett I must talk about him (bear with me because a lot of this is repetitive). While watching Stargate around midnight one night, we hear this pitiful mewing at our backdoor.

I open the door to find a malnourished, dirty Siamese kitten. I love cats, I always have. I used to take in strays and drive my mom crazy. She always made me put them back outside. I have a very tender spot, as do most people, for injured or mistreated animals, the runt of the litter or the "unwanted" pets.

Naturally I pick him up and start baby-talking him. I scrounge in the fridge for whatever I can find and give him a bowl of milk with some deli meat! It was all we had for an animal. The whole time Daniel was saying, "NO WAY! We are not keeping a cat. I hate cats! We agreed no more pets for at least 2 years and then we'd re-evaulate. Put him back outside!"

I pretended to not hear him. I held the sweet little furball on the couch. He had the loudest purr and just purred non-stop. I let him down on the floor to walk around and finally noticed the one thing that was the deal breaker for me. I knew I couldn't put him back outside.

His leg was broken. He could not put his leg down at all but held it up and it swung limply. He wouldn't touch it to the floor and it took a couple days for him to respond to touch, so I knew there wasn't nerve damage.

I made him a "litter box" of shredded newspaper. Like the good kitty that he is he went in the box, so I knew he was house-trained and probably belonged to someone. There was no way in Hades I was giving him back to his owners if they were found. For an abused and neglected kitten he was so incredibly sweet.

I put a blind eye to the vet bills I put on my credit card a few days later. An x-ray showed his break was months old and had been reinjured but it could not be "set" because the actual bone was broken (not a joint). He also had a BB pellet in his chest. The vet said he was about 9 months old based on his teeth.

They told us we should amputate his leg or they could rebuild his leg with pins (which was thousands of dollars) or we could leave it but should expect he couldn't use his leg anymore and he wouldn't be able to run or walk up and down stairs without assistance. I left the vet feeling really bad because it was not affordable. In the end we actually decided to not do anything with his leg.
And the vet was wrong!

He tears through the house, tries to scale curtains, jumps and runs, races up and down the stairs! And he is absolutely gorgeous! Oh, and he comes when I call him, which cracks me up. He can use his leg like a normal cat. You cannot tell he has an injury unless he is sitting on his haunches (then the leg sticks at like it has an invisible cast on it).

So why the long spiel about my baby boy? Because he is pathetically staring at me and meowing at me the entire time I type this. He almost gets this lusty look in his eyes and instantly purrs when he so much as sees me (unless he is in trouble, of course!). He thinks I'm his Momma. If I wear my robe he will knead me to death, and he is not declawed, and will suckle on the robe.

Here's a couple of Beckett's first pictures. He was so worn out when we brought him in that he slept a lot so he looks sleepy. Once his leg got better is when he started getting ornery!:

His leg before it healed (it now sticks out straight when he sits instead of at that funky angle)

You can see how he sickly he looks by his spine and how you can see his ribcage jutting out.

Beckett Today:

Being bashful and flirting with me!

Big yawn--- it's so hard being a cat! Look at how fat he is!

How he sits now! And yes, he loves to watch TV!

And before I forget or am asked... how did he get his name? Stargate Atlantis, of course! Dr. Beckett happens to be our favorite character. And the name really fits his personality based on the character in the show. Plus they both have blue eyes, too, so there ya go!

Sometimes, when he is in trouble, he does get called, "Beckett Shepherd!" All you Stargate fans will get it, I'm sure. :-Þ

He is now 1 year and 3 months old.

P.S. Daniel LOVES him and adores him. He melted the moment Beckett limped to him, purring like a race car. He kept trying to act like a macho man who didn't want a cat but he succumbed to the love he felt for this furball!

Pregnancy makes us irresistable to animals... or upsetting. How are your pets treating you?!

Frailty of Life

I've been missing my mom the past week, more than usual. She died November 15, 2004 of cancer. I was there when she took her last breath, when I was almost as far along with Butterfly as I am right now with this baby.

I don't know if it is because of the hormonal changes when pregnant that I get way more sentimental about her death or what.

Sometimes I forget she is gone and I almost grab the phone up to tell her about the funny things the girls say and do! I even forget that she doesn't know them (in the sense that she's in a mortal body and hanging out with them, loving them, letting them get to know her, etc.). It's almost like she's known them anyway and I don't even have to say anything. Just smile and know that she knows.

One thing my mom said to me often when I was a teenager was, "You'd make a great mother to boys!" I never really understand that. I still don't. I can't remember the context when she'd say that or what I was doing/saying to make her think that. So I guess that gives special meaning to finding out this little one's gender (BTW, you can vote on the top, right corner- so far it is split down the middle).

When I have an especially trying day or someone just makes me really angry and upset I end up crying for my mom. Crying because I want to talk to her, to vent to her, to tell her I don't want her advice but listen anyway. I wish I could ask her about her pregnancies and more about what we all were like when we were little (she had FIVE babies!). I missed that chance, that opportunity. It's one thing to hear it from other relatives and quite another to hear it from the very woman who carried and cared for us.

So this is a post dedicated to all of you out there who have lost a parent and wish they could just have one day to ask all the questions, or to just stare at them in comfortable silence.

I admire my mom for being a single parent and raising the youngest two of her five children (that would be me and my little brother, Matt). For going back to school and living off student loans and food stamps to become an RN. For finally finding something that made her happy and want to live again, her nursing career. It was a short-lived happiness, only a few years of nursing, but she got to take her last breath in the very hospital and on the very floor where she had worked, with her daughters and friends surrounding her.

I am at peace with my mom's death. I'm not bawling as I type this. I know in Whom I believe and I know that my mom can finally breathe again with her Creator. I've never visited her grave because I know she isn't there. I don't talk to her because even if she can hear me I already got to say everything I needed to say before she died (even if many of my questions about her life went unanswered).

But I just had to get all of this out because I miss her very much. And I wish I could physically SEE with my eyes how proud she is and hear her say how beautiful my babies are. I wish she were here to spoil them and teach them and read to them. It won't happen but it's nice to dream.

Funny story- At the funeral home they always put up a blown-up picture of the deceased. Somehow I ended up with the huge picture but I haven't been able to bring myself to hang it so it sits behind a piece of furniture in my dining room.

One day I asked Butterfly where my mom was... to get a conversation going about my mom. She got up and ran to the dining room where the picture is hidden and pulled it out. My girls love to stare at her face, and sometimes they appear to recognize her. It gives me goosebumps!

Friday, April 17, 2009

Baby Purchases!

Today I spent the day with Butterfly. We hit up Ba.bies-R-Us and Mot.herhood Ma.ternity! Can I just say that maternity clothes are the most ridiculously priced things you could ever spend money on? Even on SALE some tops were still $30. So I ended up just getting some tanks and tees- nothing that screams "trendy". But I think they look great and will feel AMAZING this summer (breathable cotton... *sigh*) and that means more to me than looking like a maternity model.

I also found a pair of clearanced jeans! They seriously rock. I like full-paneled maternity pants. Too much pressure on the lowest part of my stomach makes me want to throw up. BUT... I hate those dark blue, thick panels that you can totally see through your tops.

These jeans have a panty-hose-type fabric in a color and it feels like Heaven around my belly... and you cannot see it through my tops! Bonus!!! And they are flared at the bottom (my favorite but can't tell in picture because of how I was standing... and I'm short!).

(picture is blurry- shown wearing new jeans and a new top)

The downside was the jeans were still $30 on clearance (which is a lot for me to spend). I'm telling you- if I need or desire more maternity clothes I'm going to have to find some sort of thrift or consignment shop because it's just ridiculous. When I visited Ta.rget last week they had absolutely NO cute maternity clothes.

Okay so on to the FUN baby stuff. A few posts back I mentioned I bought an infant seat online. Well... I jumped the gun one night too soon. The next day I got a Ba.bies-R-Us coupons in the mail! For the same exact seat (different fabric) I could save almost $20!!! So heck yeah I'm taking the other one back. And we got the new seat today (and it's much prettier).

Daniel said, "This will be perfect... if it is a boy!" I think this man is ready for some more testosterone in this house, and I'm not talking about mine (you have to chuckle if you know I have PCOS and high testosterone). But it'll work for either gender, in my opinion. I love blue and green together!

Our cute new infant seat... with dollhouse dolls taking a ride!

And a day isn't complete without playing in the big box the carseat came in:

I almost bought a crib today too. But I sat there long enough and contemplated it long enough to realize I could find one much cheaper. The one I originally wanted ended up being a PIECE of junk. I couldn't even get the darn side to go up or down (had same buttons as our previous crib so it wasn't for lack of experience). Plus we only have so much left of our tax return and while I want to get a nice crib I don't want to blow the rest of our return on one piece of furniture when I can find something less expensive.

Since last night I've had a ton of lower back pain, especially on the left side, which is really weird! The sciatic nerve runs along your right side and I felt a ton of sciatic pain with Bumble Bee almost constantly on that side. So it's just weird to experience the same pain but on the left side. Pretty soon I'm going to have to use a step stool to get into and out of our bed because I'm so short. I end up pulling ligaments when I get up in the morning.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Do I HAVE to come up with a title?

Today I noticed something different. First, I'm starting to feel more queasy during breakfast than I had been before. Not really a big deal because for me it seems morning sickness sticks around the first couple weeks into the second trimester.

But I also noticed that I had a lot more energy today... though I currently seemed to have run out of fuel because I'm so tired right now.

A couple nights ago Butterfly and I decided she was ready to wear regular un.dies to bed, instead of pull-ups. When she woke up, dry, she was so proud of herself! And I was beaming. Not because it is less diapers to buy and one less child in a diaper... but because I just felt this swelling of pride that she decided she was ready to try something new and she accomplished it.

So this is the third night she's going to bed without a pull-up. BTW, she hasn't taken naps in diapers for months, just at bedtime because it is a longer stretch and she usually has a glass of water with her (no more water now for obvious reasons!).

Will there probably be mistakes? Sure, maybe! That's what mattress protectors are for... But we're going to focus on the positives and keep encouraging her.

Butterfly is definitely not a person you can push or pressure into something. She will fight and cry if she's not ready- in fact that is true for most children. When it was time to give up the binky it was on her time. When she finally slept in the crib instead of my arms it was on her time. Going potty was on her time. And I don't mind that one bit! I want my children to flourish in their personalities instead of conform to what I think they should be.

Bumble Bee has been pushing her independence. Okay, I guess that's not exactly right. She has been independent since she was a newborn! If she could've made her own bottles and clothed herself I think she would have. Her newest thing is walking up and down the stairs by herself. She'll say, "I do it! I do it!" and push me away.

That's probably one of the biggest differences in my kids. Butterfly loves for me to help her when she's ready, to encourage her and coax her... but Bumble Bee just wants me to root for her from the sidelines and seems ready for anything at any moment.

Okay well I'm just rambling and I'm so tired I could fall over.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Best of Both Worlds

My husband has a deep dark secret. He is leading a double life! Much like Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus. You see, he's a huge fan of Miley's music and he made no secret of this obsession when he begged to go see Hannah Montana: The Movie, when he bought the soundtrack for the movie AND one of Miley's CDs as herself (instead of her alter-ego) and when I found him showing Butterfly some of her music videos online... and the cherry on top of it all? He follows her on Twitter! Yes, we know what Miss Miley is doing throughout her day!

I'm very disturbed by my tattooed/pierced/rocker husband's newfound love for this music (no, he's not in love with HER, just the music... believe me, he's admitted many of his celebrity crushes and this isn't one of them).

But apparently (cue violin) during a really rough day he decided to turn on Radio Disney and one of her songs was playing. It really helped him deal with his current emotional issue and ever since he's been hooked! Some of the lyrics to the song (now that I've had her music beaten into my brains): "Don't let anyone tell you that you're not strong enough!"

So you can imagine my thrill to find a Hannah Montana throw blanket on clearance for $3.50 today. I usually don't just buy frivolous things but this was too funny to pass up. Thinking it'd be a GAG gift... I didn't know my husband would actually fight our 3-year-old over the blanket...

Cuddling with his new blankie of his new favorite superstar:

Noticed I had the camera and started yelling and covering his face!

Telling me to stop and that that was enough pictures and I better not post them on my blog! Probably because the blanket is PINK!

And because this post may have disturbed you as well... (let's face it, when you skip the end of Lost so you can see her perform on American Idol you got issues!). I will end with a picture of my cutie-patootie Bumble Bee donning blue "lipstick" (aka marker)!

So tell me... what is something your husband does that makes you take a step back and go, "What?!"

P.S. I think I may need to go buy a couple more of these blankets, one for each of my girls, because Daddy doesn't want to share!

Monday, April 13, 2009

Week 13!

It's so confusing determining when the 2nd trimester begins (most books say 14 weeks) but my understanding is this:

Weeks 1-12 = First Trimester
Weeks 13-27 = Second Trimester
Weeks 28-40 = Third Trimester

So I am officially, by my calculations, in the 2nd trimester! Here come the baby kicks, the gender scan, and the blossoming baby bump... I cannot believe how fast time is going! I seriously thought it would drag by. But when your days are filled with so much childcare and household duties the days just melt together.

Tonight I found THIS used baby swing on for half of what it costs new and the seller said it was all mine so long as I pick it up! I can now cross one thing off the list.

I'm not picky. I don't have to have every little thing brand new. But I do want the crib and carseat brand new, of course, for safety reasons. I have actually narrowed it down and just purchased THIS carseat and crib mattress and used the option to pickup at the store to save on shipping! I like the carseat because it'll match our car and is neutral for boy or girl AND it is Eve.nflo which is my favorite carseat brand.

All I really need now is the crib, as far as baby gear goes. No rush, of course, but we just got our tax return and I want to make sure we get what we need before the rest goes toward bills.

I'll probably spend the summer scouring yard sales for baby clothes if we're having a boy! I remember waddling through a neighborhood yard sale (it was actually the entire town) when 9 months pregnant with Butterfly trying to find her a dresser. So many great deals (like her changing table was $5)!

As far as symptoms go this is a pretty laid-back pregnancy so far. I do keep waking up with headaches, which is annoying, but it won't last forever. Otherwise I feel fine. Just feel like a normal, pregnant lady who gets breathless walking up the stairs (especially when dragging a 30-lb child up with me) and who has to nibble on stuff constantly and wants to go to bed by 3 o'clock.

Friday, April 10, 2009

Horror of Horrors- and first baby purchase

Today I was weighed.


I've gained 9 lbs. Granted I was wearing a thick, heavy sweater and I had just eaten lunch. So it's probably closer to 6-7 lbs in truth (which makes me feel a little better, so let me believe!). In fact, I made my next appointment for the morning, before lunch!

I'm going to be more careful with how I eat, making sure I get a little more exercise in, too. Not so I can lose weight, but so I can gain weight more appropriately for my size. I'm coming in this already large-n-in-charge and the larger you are the more careful you have to be or you run some pretty major risks (gestational diabetes, pre-eclampsia, edema, etc.).

Okay, now for the fun stuff! Butterfly went with me to the appointment and we got to listen to the heartbeat. Doc said it was coming in around 157 bpm! It took him some time to find the heartbeat but I wasn't worried. Once he found it baby moved away. How cool is that?! I was thinking to myself, "They're in there... moving around!"

I've always been really skeptical of the women who say they feel movement before week 16 but I swear I feel flutters really low, where the bone is and I don't have gas. I'm not going to count it as real yet. Maybe it is baby and maybe it isn't! Maybe my bowels are just trying to chat with me; I don't know! But it's very interesting to the say the least and fun to guess. I know what baby movements feel like and gas DOES feel like baby movements- this was just different!

After my appointment Butterfly and I went out to get her some new shoes and shop around. While at T.arget (they have the cutest shoes right now, BTW) I found this hand-carved wooden elephant made in India. I couldn't resist getting it, even if we're not having a boy!

My second purchase was a really cool toy I found on clearance at W.almart. They are soft, large nesting blocks!

I have to be honest... we just got our tax return and I wanted to buy the infant seat and the crib but I was a good girl and decided to wait until Daniel was with me. I really want to get a big item that we need! I'll definitely post when we do get some more baby stuff. But alas, those are my first two purchases for this baby!

And here's a shot of the nursery so far. It is taking me forever to paint the trim. I get tired too easily and I have to stop when my body decides it is time to stop. I bought rollers tonight so I'll be able to start rolling on the green for the bottom half of the wall:

I have no idea what to do with the closet door? Should I paint it brown like the rest of the trim? It's solid wood and antique (6-paneled doors are extremely expensive!) so I'm kind of put-off with painting it... but it also looks strangely "orange-ish" now. And the previous little child who lived in the room (before we bought the house) GLUED stickers and baseball cards all over the door. I've tried Goo Be Gone and Mineral Spirits to get it off but you can still see some of the stubborn gunk that wouldn't come off.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

WHAT is that SMELL?

I feel like a hound dog.

When I'm not pregnant I'm very scent-conscious. When I walk into a home or a room or restaurant my first instinct it to take a deep breath and smell. My husband usually can tell I will start complaining about the smell of a restaurant by the wrinkling of my nose (if they allow smoking).

But now that my nose has gone on heightened awareness?! Almost everything stinks. I seriously want to just sit down and cry sometimes. I find myself cleaning constantly, trying to get rid of whatever slight offense is bothering me. And of course no one else can smell it.

I don't remember it being this bad in other pregnancies. The trash is constantly taken out, I carry the Lysol around with me, the cat box is scooped 2-3 times a day, I burn candles all day, wash clothes and sheets almost every other day. I just don't know what else I can do!

Sorry, this seems really whiny and the last thing I want to do is whine! I just can't stand stink, even when I'm not pregnant. Not being able to find a smell or get rid of one or finding new ones is just driving me batty.

I'm also frustrated because I feel like I'm doing it all here. I can't tell you the last time my husband washed a dish or threw some clothes in the washer or bathed the kids himself. I felt really sick yesterday and asked him to put Bumble Bee's pajamas on but he walked out of the room! In fact, I'm the one who cleaned the litterbox last night before bed because it was so stinky I couldn't go to sleep. I need help. I just feel like my battles are never-ending. And I feel like all my husband does is watch TV, get on the computer, or play his stupid games. We're all invisible here or something. UGH! He's not a bad guy but I'm about to blow and it isn't going to be pretty. HELP!!!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Chuggin' Along

My next OB appointment is Friday. I am so excited to hear the heartbeat! I've never had an instance where they couldn't find a heartbeat with my previous pregnancies with the girls so I'm hoping we find it right away.

Right now I have really bad indigestion. My stomach feels like it is on fire. Butterfly went to bed with a stomachache, too, so maybe it was something we ate. Unfortunately my pregnancy brain refuses to remind me of what we ate today. Go figure!

I've been drinking enormous amounts of milk lately. I can't get enough of it. It has to be ice cold. I think the reason is because ALL meat completely turns me off right now and I probably need the protein and calcium. Pregnancy has a funny way of figuring out exactly what you need.

We went on two walks today; one before lunch and one after dinner. By the second walk my back was hurting really bad and Elaina was holding her stomach so we pitifully trekked back to the house. I feel like I'm already getting that "pregnant waddle" because of my back... and I'm only 3 months along!

Nursery so far... is not getting very far. I should go paint after I finish this up. I'm so tired during the day but get all this energy at night. I don't have any rollers right now (good excuse to get out of the house!) so I'll work on the walls later. I think I am going to go with the green because I need to use the paint. No sense in wasting it! And it's a beautiful color.

I think I've gained 4 lbs so far. Friday will tell! I'm hoping it isn't more. I feel hungry constantly so I graze all day. I don't want it to come back and bite me in the butt--- literally! I do not want to gain 50 lbs like I did with Butterfly. I would be huge if I did.

I've started wondering what this little one will look like. My girls both have brown eyes, like their Daddy. However everyone on my side of the family has green or blue eyes, no brown. I personally have green eyes. I took Genetics in school so I understand brown eyes are dominant and green eyes are considered "rare" in genetics. But Daniel also has blue-eyed family members, too, so I'm just wondering about our baby's eyes! Personally, I love brown eyes! But I am trying to picture how they'll look, if they'll break the brown-eye mold and have lighter eyes. It's so fun to daydream about! I've had dreams and I can't wait to see if my dreams show a true likeness to what baby will be.

Butterfly's eyes were originally a gorgeous shade of green. And they gradually changed into a green-gold and are now a beautiful golden, hazel color. Bumble Bee's eyes are like dark, melted chocolate, exactly like her Daddy's eyes. The "experts" say that your child's eyes will be their true color by the time they hit a year old but Butterfly's eyes (and her cousin, Pink's eyes) kept changing long after that!

On a side note- you know you watch too much Stargate when your 3-year-old will only draw pictures of Stargates and people waiting to go through the Stargate. Yup. That's Butterfly's new obsession right now. Ha ha! I'd take a picture of her drawing but I don't feel like getting up and it's too dark to take a pic.

Nothing much else going on. Waiting to get our tax return so we can blow it on bills and fix the tires on our van. Yay! Nothing like getting money only to have to give it away to someone else.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Week 12- Updated with pics

Wow- I'm to that magical week when the risk of miscarriage lowers so significantly that I can finally breathe a sigh of relief. Of course, there's never a truly safe point in pregnancy but I am not planning on living in fear.

Feeling about the same. The morning sickness hasn't been bad at all, whatsoever. Just a little bout here and there, maybe every other day for a few minutes. Yes, I realize how incredibly blessed I am!

Still going pee like a racehorse, around the clock. I've started waking up to go in the middle of the night now. Baby is just getting too big on my bladder to keep it in all the night long. I had been holding it since we have wood floors that creak and I didn't want to wake my kids. Well, too bad now. Plus, I don't want a UTI!

This is my last week in the 1st trimester! I am so incredibly excited to move onto the next phase in the pregnancy (the FUN phase). Baby is about 2 inches long right now! Look at my little 3D baby, all curled up!!!

I started painting the nursery trim last night. I started daydreaming about nursery themes, for boys. For some reason it's just a lot harder to come up with a boy theme. Then I thought, "I really like elephants, so maybe we could do an elephant theme!" Colors would be green, blue and brown. Still have to see what the husband thinks. *ADDED PAINT COLOR PICS AT BOTTOM*

On a side note I really wish the apartments next door would be torn down and either made into some sort of little neighbor playground or a little house or something else. I'm so sick of it. Not only can they see right over into our backyard but someone keeps flicking cigarette butts onto our wooden steps. I don't want my house to catch on fire (yes I will speak to the landlord; though not sure what he's going to do about it).

I brought that up because I can hear people next door banging on their truck, trying to "fix it". The nursery is right next to the apartment. Just not a happy camper with them right now.

Please take a moment to send some prayers this way today. Most of you already follow this blog or know of it but wanted to direct you there because today would've been Audrey's first birthday. Click HERE.

I wanted to update with pictures of the paint that I have. I have had this can of green paint for a long time (got it for $5 at H.ome D.epot).

I want to use the green on the bottom half of the wall.
I want to use the cream color for the top half.
And obviously the trim is that chocolate color (would also be chair rail color).

So what do you think?! The colors are really close to the true color (except the cream; it's kind of off). I might even paint the room like this if we're having a girl and use pink & burgandy accents with dragonflies and/or ladybugs. If it is a boy I'd use blue accents with the elephant theme.

Daniel and I think it'd be fun to reveal our baby's gender by revealing the nursery once it is complete (it takes me one day to paint a room this size and I'm already getting a head-start). So instead of telling his family right away (my sister will get to know first, sorry!) we'll wait and have them come over for a brunch/snack and reveal the nursery. Since we didn't have a fun way to tell everyone we were pregnant we'll have a fun way to tell them the gender!

Monday, April 6, 2009

A Day of Anticipation

This morning my FIL dropped off Anne's two children--- because she was being induced this morning to have her third baby, a boy! I promised I'd let you all know when he arrived and he is here! He is now almost 4 hours old, born at 1:16pm at a whopping 8 lbs 9 ounces. Big boy!

I've gotten one picture-mail of him (we'll get to visit him tomorrow at the hospital) and he's adorable, with lots of dark hair.

If you want to hear more and see pictures of him, stay tuned to Anne's blog. She is not going to be revealing his name on her blog.

Since her kids were at our house when the news came he was born, I got to tell them. Miss Pink responded by yelling and running around in excitement. She got to call her Papa and was so excited none of us could understand a word she said, ha ha!

Buddy, on the other hand, was more reserved. He kept telling me, "No" when I said his baby brother was born. I think he was worried about his Momma more than anything. When I tried to show him the picture-mail of his brother I could see some interest but he didn't want to look. I can't wait to hear their first "meeting" with their new brother.

Thank you for all of your prayers and for the many of you who waited in anticipation for this day as well! Everyone is perfect, healthy, and doing great. I hear that Momma is going to be catching He.roes tonight while holding her brand new baby (I don't blame her, I'd totally do the same)! She deserves a much needed rest, too, so pray she sleeps well at the hospital.


Sunday, April 5, 2009

Bad Timing

We have survived this entire winter season without one hiccup, without anyone contracting the flu. But of course two weeks ago Daniel started coughing and we found out he had bronchitis (he is much better now, thank you!!!).

And last night my oldest daughter started yelling for me at the top of the stairs. I found her standing in a little spitup in the hallway, shaking like a leaf. I led her to the bathroom and before I could get the toilet seat up she started puking into the tub. I was trying to hold her hair back and keep myself from joining her. I cannot believe how much came out of her little body.

We changed her clothes and we changed Bumble Bee's jammies too because she wanted to after seeing big sister change (not to mention the attention she tried to get by squinting her eyes and pretending to moan, all while smiling).

I feel awful because before this happened Butterfly told me her stomach hurt and she was gassy. Thinking it was indigestion I had given her milk. Instead that made her throw up. I've read many blogs lately where a mom didn't catch their child's sickness in time and felt awful about it- I want you to know it happens to us all! And while I do feel badly I also know that when it mattered most I was right there for my daughter.

The second time she called me up she was holding her hands over her mouth and begging me to help her. I could've cried but instead led her to the bathroom where we made it to the toilet in time. Daddy did SO good, too. I just have to add that because I was gagging so badly I couldn't clean up the mess in the tub. He scrubbed that tub for a good five minutes until it glistened. And he did not utter ONE complaint! I am very proud of him in that moment, when we both kind of didn't know what to do at first.

And this morning? Butterfly is fine! At least I think so; she's up running around and playing. She did have a bout of diarrhea this morning so we have to miss out on a birthday party. I would hate, if this is contagious, to get all the birthday guests sick. But I do think it was just something she ate. Either way I want her relaxing today and taking it easy because tomorrow is a big day...

So thus the title of my post! The one weekend I don't want my kids to get sick is the weekend of a birthday party and my SIL is being induced tomorrow (Monday). I'm supposed to watch her other two children during lunchtime and we're going to order pizza and Poppy (their grandpa) is bringing chocolate milk over for all four of the kids.

So far today, so good! Butterfly has kept down breakfast, lunch, and all her water (no milk today, that's for sure!). Please pray she continues to be fine. She's not lethargic and she said her stomach doesn't hurt anymore; she never had a fever either. Thank you, Jesus! Because we really need everyone to be well for tomorrow's big day!

P.S. I totally missed that my ticker is below "200 days left" until our baby comes! And look at how cute our little 3D baby looks!!! I cannot wait for our next sonogram!!!

Friday, April 3, 2009

A Note From My Uterus

Dear Joy,

Hi, this is your uterus. I just wanted to let you know that I just wanted to skip the formalities and get straight to business. Instead of this gradual increase in size I thought we'd get right to the point. You may have noticed you can't suck your stomach in anymore, sorry about that. It's my fault.

And you may have noticed that even your maternity jeans are feeling a bit claustrophic. Yeah, that's my fault, too. And the sciatic pain? You're going to have to blame that one on me as well, since I'm sitting right on that nerve.

You see, I just don't see the point of starting off small. We've been through this song and dance before, you know what to expect, so suck it up and take it. I do have to say that when you stretch and bend too much and feel that sharp round ligament pain, I'm just warning you to take it easy.

We're in this together, for the next 7 months. Things are about to get a lot bigger and more uncomfortable. Don't worry, it's all for the best. You see I love your baby, too, and want to provide the best place for them to grow. So sit back (with your feet propped up) and enjoy the ride!


P.S. I have nothing to do with your increased bust size. You can blame that one on the baby!

11 weeks 3 days

And no, we're not having twins. I had just eaten before we took the pic.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Bag it up!

When I was pregnant with my first child, Butterfly, I was completely clueless on what I was supposed to eat. I even wrote down this question to ask my doctor (a question I never asked for fear of sounding stupid), "What am I supposed to eat when I'm pregnant?"

Fifty pounds later I gave birth to her and I realized, "Eating for two shouldn't have been taken literally!" I would eat in the middle of the night when I'd get up to pee, I lazed around the house doing nothing, ate whatever I wanted- I just felt pregnant and entitled to do as I pleased. And my body is still suffering for it. I did lose a lot of weight after giving birth to her but my habits stuck so the weight climbed back up and stayed.

So I realized I was falling into this pattern again by making unhealthy choices. Yesterday I mentioned all the fruits and vegetables I had bought. Well I decided this morning that I wanted to make all of this lovely food readily available, otherwise it would rot and not get eaten in our house. So I broke out the cutting board, the knives, and some storage containers. I absolutely LOVE cleaning and cutting fruits/veggies. It was part of my job when I worked in a nursing home and later at a coffeehouse.
Here is the result:

Pictured: bananas, cherry tomatoes, tomato, strawberries, avocado, cucumbers, celery, cauliflower, two types of apples, bag of oranges (in the way back), cantaloupe, green grapes, Romaine lettuce, carrots.

The best part of spending the morning washing and cutting the food? My kids wanted to TRY each and every single thing I was working with. As you can see, they loved the grapes! Butterfly even liked the cauliflower.

Part of this experience was learning how long each food lasted and how to store them. I used a wonderful cookbook that had details on how to pick your fruit/vegetable and how to store it and for how long! Some need to be wrapped tightly, some have to stay out of the fridge, some in plastic. You can see (by enlarging the picture) which foods were in which containers.

For lunch everyone got to pick from this smorgasborg. My own plate was full of cauliflower, cherry tomatoes, celery, carrots, Romaine lettuce and cucumbers. I felt so energized after my lunch! And I cannot wait to dive in again tomorrow, or even as a snack in a few moments.

Later today I had to use my avocado so I made some guacamole. I make mine very simple: just lemon juice and minced garlic mixed into the mashed avocado. I use about a 1-2 teaspoons of lemon juice and maybe 1-2 teaspoons of garlic. Mix and taste. Add more lemon or garlic per your taste. Some people add salt and pepper but I don't put salt in my foods so I left it out of mine.

I think I'm having some full blown sciatic pain. I just want to start off saying my first pregnancy was a breeze. I wasn't begging to go into labor at the end; I felt just fine until the real contractions hit. But I had sciatic pain the entire pregnancy with Bumble Bee and was miserable in that aspect. I was ready for her to come!

One thing I've learned as a mother is that we don't give up! When we're sick or in pain we keep being a mom. I got so much done today, which makes me proud, despite the fact I couldn't get comfortable.

I am regularly not a light sleeper. But I have been sleeping so lightly recently that I feel like I never fall asleep. For one, I can't get comfortable. And two, I don't get up in the middle of the night to pee (I drink water up until my head hits the pillow, too). So I'm thinking that my full bladder in that early morning hour is what keeps me sleeping lightly.

But I feel like things are going great. I am not complaining so sorry if it does come off that way; I just want to be true to my symptoms and experience and sometimes the symptoms with pregnancy aren't all sunshine and rainbows. I don't feel grouchy or short-tempered. Though I do have to admit that I'm ready for some helping hands around here (*ahem*Daniel*ahem*) because my back probably can't handle the vacuuming or bending to put clothes in the dryer.

How are y'all feeling?!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Baby Got [Broken] Back!

Today was one of those days that I got everything done and yet nothing done. Sure, the dishes were cleaned and the groceries put away. But I still have so much to do. Daniel has been sick so I've been on my own because he's afraid of touching the girls to help out (he has bronchitis and a little bit of pink eye).

Part of being on my own was taking out the trash this morning. And this Momma thinks she put her back out. I'm trying SO hard not to complain but this hurts and it hurts bad.

To add to that injury I took Bumble Bee with me to, T.arget and the grocery store today. Which means a lot of 30-lb lifting to get that child in the cart, into the carseat and down again. And a lot of pushing, reaching, bending to shop (including a huge thing of cat litter, and I had to change that cat box to boot; yes I scrubbed my hands and nails good, Moms!).

On the bright side I got to shop, despite the hunching and groaning! And that was wonderful. I got birthday gifts for a couple little girls in my life who will be having birthdays in the next two months, Bumble Bee got new shoes with her giftcard, and we bought the Funny Bunny Basket stuff.

You see we do "Easter" a little differently now. Easter Sunday is a day to celebrate Jesus rising from the grave; not play with an Easter Bunny so we're going to celebrate spring the Saturday before Easter (with baskets and egg hunt). People are totally free to do as they feel for their family; just sharing what we do in ours!

I decided to go to a grocery store I hadn't been to in awhile. I had been shopping at the Su.percenter but their produce and meat just isn't up to par and I don't mind paying just a tiny bit more for quality (especially because anything gross is apt to make me gag). Oh it was like Heaven!

I bought apples, bananas, cauliflower, Romaine, carrots, celery, tomatoes, avocado... YUM! (Making you hungry, Andrea? Just doing my job!) I also bought some KICK BUTT salsa that is made near us, in Kansas. It is all natural and they use sea salt instead of idodized salt. It's chunky but not TOO chunky (I hate huge pieces of tomato). There is nothing added to this stuff at all; it's just the vegetables. They have tiny pieces of jalepenos in there to give the salsa a GREAT spicy kick too! It's called "Ornery Hombre" by Jumping Jacks! Don't know if they sell nationally or not but you can check out their website HERE.

Butterfly did homeschooling with Nonna today. After her nap she comes up to me and says, "The earth is the Lord's and all that it contains!"

I told her, "That's right! Where does it say that?"

Her reply? "At Nonna's house!"

"Are you sure it's not in the Bible?"

"Yes... because the Bible tells me so!"

In the grocery store, our last stop of the day, I was pushing the cart with one hand and holding my list and coupons in the other. I was highly aggitated at this point, over-heated, hungry... Bumble Bee starts mouthing off to me as only 2-year-olds can.

"That is not nice! You do not talk to your Momma like that. What do you say?"

"Sowwy, Momma!"

"I forgive you."

"Sowwy MOMMA!"

"I forgive you!"


"I FORGIVE YOU! Thank you?!"

A calm... "You we-come."