Friday, March 6, 2009

Miscarriage

This is the point where I miscarried in my last pregnancy. It's a surreal feeling to remember that pain but be in anticipation of another life. It was only a few months ago that I was bleeding and crying my heart out, curled up on my bed in the blackness of my room asking God what He was doing.

I knew that He had a plan but I was completely oblivious to it, as we usually are.

I still don't know what is in store for us but all I can do is trust and enjoy every minute I'm blessed with this pregnancy. I'm so excited. I keep walking into the somewhat empty nursery thinking, "There is going to be another baby here!" Wow!

I'm such an eager person but I've been exercising self-control. I don't have baby stuff all over the house... yet. I think it would drive me even more crazy to see all of it and have to wait so many months.

I did go up to our 3rd story (aka attic) last night to dig through the girls old clothes looking for summer pajamas and clothes since we had a few warm days. And I pulled out a few newborn onesies. I cannot believe my girls were EVER that tiny. I just cannot fathom it. And I cannot wait to fill the onesies with a sweet little newborn!

6 comments:

Andrea said...

Whew! You scared me with the title of this post, before I started reading. I remember hitting 5w3d. I felt the same as you, kind of bittersweet. I wasn't overly worried that day, but mainly I just thought about the last pregnancy and that horrible day that it ended.

I'm so glad that everything has gone smoothly for you this time!!! This baby of yours is going to be so precious and can I just say AGAIN that I'm so glad we're due around the same time!!!!

Joy said...

Sorry, Andrea! It does make it clickable, though, doesn't it?! I'm not overly worried today either but it's just weird to think that instead of being 20 weeks now I'm only 7 weeks. But God wanted this specific baby to be born so we're pumped!

Julie said...

Joy Renee! You scared me so bad when I saw the Title Link! Don't do that again! (that's Mom yelling at you)

Susan Sene said...

Yeah ok your title scared me. :) I a almost at the point where I found out we lost ours last time too...it's a very different feeling - remember the sadness but also being so happy for where God has brought you.

Gootz said...

I'm going to say it, that title seriously freaked me out!

I'm glad you're doing alright though. Take care of yourself!



-Michael
(from medhelp, if you don't remember lol)

Kat470 said...

How amazing that you've now surpassed the point you got with your last pregnancy. I have a feeling this will be a very healthy, uneventful pregnancy for you. :-D