My ticker says 6 weeks now! Wow, I feel like time is moving slow as molasses. I keep waiting for something bad to happen, which is not healthy. I keep checking the TP when I go to the bathroom. I have lost my pregnancy innocence the first time I had a miscarriage. The second miscarriage did nothing to alleviate the fear, only intensified it.
Nonetheless I'm still enjoying this pregnancy much more than I enjoyed my pregnancy with Bumble Bee, especially at this point. Now I'm not saying I regret my pregnancy with Bumble Bee whatsoever! What I'm saying is I was so terrified of losing her that I kept an emotional distance from her until she was in my arms. We actually tried to get pregnant with Bumble Bee, whereas this one was an unexpected surprise!
I've already gotten paint chips from the store and I cleared out the nursery closet. I put all of Bumble Bee's clothes in Butterfly's room. Today I took out her bookshelf and all of her books to put back in the playroom. Her room is starting to look bare!
Today I did way too much. I forget I have limits. I'm not fragile like spun glass by any means, but I really want to be careful. I carried our ladder and vacuum downstairs, took Bumble Bee's bookshelf and books down, and carried a desk down and out to the curb. Yes, shame on me! And believe me, I'm regretting it all. At the time I felt strong and capable, now I feel very pregnant and crampy.
I just really wanted the house cleaned up for Daniel's return but I know he's going to give me a stern talkin' to because he'd rather the house be a mess than I be in pain (awwww--- isn't he sweet?!). So just feeling crampy. I laid down and watched hours of TV after the girls were in bed. No spotting or anything like that, thank the Lord!
So I'm taking it E-A-S-Y Tuesday. It'll just be Bumble Bee and me most of the day since Butterfly will be with Nonna. We'll probably laze around and watch a movie, read books, play with blocks- who knows?!
And yes, I learned my lesson! Next time I'm calling my mom-in-law or whatever male family members are around if I need something done, I PROMISE!