Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Dear Mr. Blanks

My legs are shaky, I can barely walk... they feel like Jell-O... Those bootcamp videos are butt-kicking! PHEW! I bought Abs Bootcamp and Ultimate Bootcamp. I could NOT finish either of them. I did the Abs one the other day and my abs HURT (even to breathe) for two full days after.

I did Ultimate today and I felt like I was going to collapse in the shower afterwards. I have to tell you, though, that working out feels SO good. I've always loved working out. In fact, I used to walk everywhere and I had the cutest butt ever. Seriously! I once caught Daniel looking as we were walking up the stairs at church. I had these cool dragons appliqued onto the back pockets and he swears up and down, to this day, that he was looking at the dragons! I ain't never seen NO man look at dragons THAT way!

Anyway I feel good and energetic. I hope this motivation lasts so you guys don't stop pumping me up! I have to admit I'm incredibly driven right now to lose weight. I've been fine with not being pregnant but this last cycle was the last straw and now I can barely make myself go into the pregnancy forums that I lead.

But there are many reasons I'm driven right now.

1). I HAVE to lose weight! I don't want to end up like some people I've known, including my mom. Diabetes runs in the family and while my insulin/glucose are normal right now I'm worried that with PCOS diagnosis my chances are higher.

2). Seeing old pictures of myself, getting out my old jeans (I still have my dragon jeans!). I used to be a size 6! Now I can't even fit my thigh into the opening of my dragon jeans (totally kidding... I can kind of get it in there! Okay, kidding again...).

3). I want a baby. Butterfly asks me every single night now. I don't talk about babies, except to mention Aunt Anne's new baby. Butterfly tells me, "Aunt Anne has a baby in her tummy like you?" Then I have to explain that I don't have one but she is still very confused. And tonight she told me to send Bumble Bee away and have a new baby. GREEEEEAT! I had to explain how we don't get rid of one another.

Butterfly gets very hurt by this. After having a chat with her tonight about why Mommy is exercising and waiting to have a baby, she whispered, "I keep askin' Jebus for a baby, Momma." It near breaks my heart!


Monkey's Momma said...

Good for you! keep up the good work!

Ris said...

That is awesome. I am so proud of you! You can get it off! Keep those dragon pants and work towards fitting back into them. That's how I know when I'm doing better. It's hard. I will tell you, Weight Watchers is really working for me. I have lost 3 pounds in two weeks. And that is a lot being that I was stagnant for so long. You really would only have to go to one meeting to get the materials, etc...then could follow at home without paying. That's what I am doing. Email me if you want any info. However you do it, I will be here to encourage you!

Sweet about Elaina wanting to get a baby, and I had to laugh about the trading Abby part. LOL She would SO miss her sis! Little girls. Too cute. Your turn is coming! It may be more fun to have part of your pregnancy where you are the only one that is pregnant. Of course you don't want to be pregnant because someone else is! You are pregnant because GOd put that desire in your heart. ANd he gives us those desires for a reason! Praying for you!

Tasha Via said...

You can do it!!! Stay motivated your doing awesome=)

Anonymous said...

Elaina is just precious! Good for you with working out! I know you will continue to feel better. Once you start seeing results, it'll be easier to stick with the program.

It'll also be better for your body and the next baby if you are in shape. It's harder to lose baby weight if you never lost it with the previous ones.

You go girl!

Andrea said...

You can do it!! The abs were the hardest for me. I kept giving up and would only do the workout every once in awhile. Finally I just quit the ab workout I was doing (it really strained my neck) and started doing pilates which are working much better for me. I actually have ab muscles now! So if your ab workout is too intense or you aren't enjoying it, try the pilates out.

Oh yeah, and petty reasons are okay to have, most people are driven by them. You have heard my petty reasons! Including wanting to take a break one cycle so my baby isn't born the same month as SIL's baby! We're still TTC this month...wouldn't it figure that I will get pregnant this month, the only month I don't really care if it happens because then my baby would share a birthday with his aunt, uncle, & cousin?